I overheard this conversation a few days ago.

I imagined a much younger me listening to the same conversation and hearing it totally differently.

It was between two guys in their (I think) early 20’s.

It went something like this:

First guy:

So, Saturday. ‘We out?

Second guy:

Nah I can’t. I’ve got my daughter with me all weekend.

First guy:

Aw can’t you get someone to look after her for the night?

Second guy

“I’ve no idea.”

First guy:

Well have you tried?

Second guy:


First guy:

Well; why not?

Second guy:

“Because I’d rather be with her than you.”


This was really interesting for me.

Because I’ve been the first guy.

And I’ve been the second guy.

I found it interesting how these two guys saw the world so differently.

Yet were still friends.

Both focused on their own realities and priorities.

But what struck me most was the unflinching language from the second guy.

His surety.

I liked that.

He was not going to be pressured.

And his friend just knew it.

He was a young man that knew his own mind and what he wanted.

And, from what I saw and heard in the five minutes I was earwigging, he had the makings of a good dad too.

Long may it last.


  1. Wow! That’s powerful. How good was that second guy’s response. I was so wanting him to choose the option to prioritise time with his daughter, as I read the conversation thread. But I didn’t expect him to be so forthright, so unflinching. Thanks, Michael. Paul

    • I think it showed two things Paul.

      First, their friendship was strong enough to take this language. They were smiling. But the sentiment was sincere from the 20 year old guy. He wanted to be with his daughter.

      Secondly, it showed that young people can – and should – think for themselves in a world that is so unfairly constantly giving them cues of how they ‘should’ be.

      It’s nice to see young people being assertive. Doing what they feel is right for them. F*ck what other people think.

      Have a good day Paul.


  2. Janet Chaston Reply

    I wish I could be as straight talking as the ‘Dad’ and not worry to not upset who I was speaking to. I did wonder how this conversation was going to go and love the outcome……lesson learned for me.

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