Here are 4 things I would never dream of doing as a 50 year old man.

I am, after all, a grown up and appreciate fully that all of them are silly.

  1. Think of all the things I didn’t do when I was younger and look for someone to blame. And if there is no one around and no one I can call, blame myself. 
  2. Take a look at all the people younger than me that do have the opportunity to do all the things that I didn’t do, and tell them how stupid they are for not doing all the things I didn’t do at their age (see 1.). I think younger people like it when older people do this. Especially if they are your own children.
  3. Think about all the things that I used to do that I am clearly far too old to do any more, then moan about the fact that I can no longer do them.
  4. Worry about all the bad things that could happen to me, even in the knowledge that over 90% of the things that human beings worry about happening, never actually do happen. I would no more likely do this than walk around with an umbrella up on a sunny day in readiness for when it next rains. Both are silly.

So to be clear, the reason I would never do any of these things is because I am an intelligent person and none of them make sense.

I am – as all that know me know – prefect.

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